Few things in this world inspire uncontrollable rage in me.
Patrick Maxwell’s “Jersey Shore” column is one of them. Glenn Beck-style, at that.
Literally, I cried for America.
Now before I trash this show, I’d like to say that I am not entirely against reality programming. In fact, I have a decade-too-late affliction with “The Real World.” I love that show! I live-tweet during each new episode, which, if you’re one of my 50 followers on Twitter (which you’re probably not), you would despairingly know about.
But apart from MTV’s long-running “Real World,” I steer clear of reality television, mostly because none of the shows appeal to me. I don’t care too much about Flava Flav trying to find a girlfriend, probably because he stopped being relevant 20 years ago. I don’t care about teenage moms, either. That show just reminds me far too much of my high school.
But “Jersey Shore”? That show is an entirely different beast.
Never before have I seen a show celebrate utter stupidity in such grandiose fashion. I watched an episode a few weeks ago with my sister. Basically the show consisted of drunken sex, failing at menial, everyday tasks such as making dinner, fist-pumping at the club and more drunken sex.
Oh, except the last bit of drunken sex was much more degrading to the woman who this guy called “The Situation” was with. I guess you could say it did not end up being a good situation for her.
But I digress. The problem here, Patrick, is that “Jersey Shore” is not in any sense of the word a “comedy,” unless you lump unintentional comedy into the genre. We aren’t watching a skillfully crafted sitcom. We’re watching real, essentially brain-dead people exploit their stupidity for an absurd amount of money.
Seriously. These people are getting paid five digits to be real-life idiots in front of a camera while people in parts of the world are starving.
And what is this comparing Snooki to Lucille Ball? What’s next, comparing DJ Pauly D to Bob Hope?
Don’t you dare.
I also see that you praised the show’s editing. What’s the use in that? Editing is a trivial matter on a show of this nature. Praising “Jersey Shore” for its editing is like praising “Gigli” for its use of Jennifer Lopez’s butt.
Patrick said well-constructed reality shows “should be praised for their ability to create larger-than-life characters and narratives.” What narrative does “Jersey Shore” follow, the never-ending desire to get drunk and have sex? Come on. We’re not talking about the story arc of “The Godfather” trilogy here.
No matter how you try to sugarcoat it, “Jersey Shore” is reality trash — nothing more. Sure, it might be fascinating, but not because it does important things, like explain to us what the Big Bang was, but because we love to watch guidettes get in catfights.
Essentially, it’s fascinating because America likes to watch trainwrecks — people who are worse off than themselves.
If “Jersey Shore” can be praised for one thing, that’s it for sure.
