This is part of a weekly series called “Pop Opinions” where The Lantern offers its take on the week’s pop culture news.

1Dad

I was doing some very adult grocery shopping (two Diet Mountain Dews and king-size Reese’s from the GoCo next to my apartment), when I got a very adult text from a friend.

“Louis is going to be a dad,” it read.

Is Louis an ex-lover of mine? Of hers? A mutual friend? Nope, nope, and nope. Without any clarification, I knew my friend was talking about Louis Tomlinson of One Direction.

“Wow, your life is sad.” I know, reader. You should have gotten that from the fact that my dinner is made up entirely of sugar and chemicals.

But what is even sadder is the future of One Direction. Spoiler: it’s going down.

It’s one thing when your dark, brooding beauty leaves the band. It’s a whole other thing when a member knocks up a friend of his.

Yes, a friend. They’re just friends. This is being downplayed tremendously. Yes, friends with benefits exist. But friends with benefits, a baby and a boy band are unheard of.

“Now the band is deff over I’m so gonna cry at the concert,” a follow-up text read.

GoCo and I are here with sugar and chemicals for all broken-hearted Directioners.

 

Not #squadgoals

A trailer for DC Comics’ “Suicide Squad” was released this past week following Comic-Con in San Diego.

Con attendees were shown an exclusive glimpse at the movie — featuring Jared Leto as a tattooed, grilled-out Joker — on Saturday.

Since it’s the 21st century, shoddy cell phone videos of the exclusive were leaked online.

On Monday, Warner Brothers released an official version of the trailer online with the comment, “We regret this decision as it was our intention to keep the footage as a unique experience for the Comic-Con crowd, but we cannot continue to allow the film to be represented by the poor quality of the pirated footage stolen from our presentation.”

On the one hand, there’s no way Warner Bros could expect that with that many tech-savvy, excited fans of the film in one room that it would stay there.

On the other hand, it kind of sucks that nothing is exclusive anymore with social media.

Thanks, @POTUS.