The job of Ohio State’s football coach is three-fold. First, he needs to graduate a high percentage of his players. Second, he needs to win the Big Ten and go to the Rose Bowl. Third, he needs to beat Michigan.John Cooper, 13 years into his tenure as OSU’s head football coach, has managed to accomplish none of these things on a regular basis. About 43 percent of OSU football players earn their degrees. That figure places OSU at the bottom of the Big Ten. Cooper has taken the Buckeyes to ZERO outright conference championships and only one Rose Bowl in his 13 seasons.And, of course, Cooper’s appalingly pathetic 2-10-1 record against the Wolverines is a nationally known figure.For this parade of spectacular failures, Cooper is paid the princely sum of more than $1 million per year. A million bucks hasn’t been wasted on such a grand scale since the construction of the Spruce Goose.By almost any objective measure, the 13 years of the Buckeye program under Cooper have been worse than the 13 years prior to Coop’s arrival.The 1975-1987 Buckeyes compiled a better record, more wins over Michigan, more outright and shared Big Ten titles, more Rose Bowl trips and graduated more players, too.How is it possible that his job is completely safe? Does he have compromising photos of someone or something?It has become painfully clear that Cooper’s teams repeat a simple recipe every season.The year starts fast: Cooper’s teams are 39-5 in the months of August and September.The team keeps looking good in October, where Cooper’s record is 40-16-2. Some seasons feature a couple losses before Halloween, but mostly, the S.S. Buckeye looks strong heading into November. Then the season goes down the drain. Cooper’s record in November is 28-15-3. That represents a drop of more than .200 from his September and October winning percentages. The lifeless Buckeyes then collapse in the bowl game. Cooper’s record in December and January is a stunningly poor 3-7.If this recipe sounds familiar, that’s because it has happened a lot. The 1989, ’90, ’91, ’92, ’95, ’97 and ’99 seasons all followed this pattern closely, and the 2000 season seems to be doing so as well. There’s no reason to believe that this will change under Cooper. It’s time for a change in Columbus. John Cooper has had 13 years to figure out a recipe for beating Michigan and these efforts have resulted in nothing short of failure. Saturday’s loss was just another example of Cooper’s inadequacies in the big game. With nine seconds left in the first half, Steve Bellisari was sacked. Three OSU offensive linemen stood around, watching Bellisari for four seconds before someone called timeout. Had a timeout been called immediately, the Buckeyes would have enjoyed another shot at the end zone before settling for a field goal. Instead, the four seconds were wasted, and with it, a golden opportunity to re-take the lead.The Bucks had to settle for a field goal try and a 14-12 halftime deficit. It seems that well-coached players would have recognized the situation, realized that time was at a premium and that their team had a timeout, and used it.Another example of Cooper’s gameday shortcomings came after Jonathan Wells scored a touchdown to cut Michigan’s lead to 31-18. With an incredibly obvious two-point conversion attempt staring him in the face, Coop elected to kick the extra point. After the game, Cooper defended his choice, saying, “We have a chart up in the press box that tells us what to go for, go for one or go for two, and the chart said in that particular situation ‘go for one’.”The situation, just to clarify matters, was that the Buckeyes trailed the Wolverines by exactly one touchdown, one field goal, and two two-point conversions. Had the Buckeyes successfully executed a two-point conversion, they would have been left just a touchdown, two-point conversion and field goal from a tie game.Instead, Cooper opted to kick the point, leaving the Buckeyes 12 points behind Michigan. Two touchdowns would have won it. Had the Buckeyes tried for two and failed, they would have been left 13 points back. Two touchdowns would have won it.OSU needs a coach with a better chart or basic math skills. Enough is enough.Coop, do yourself a favor and resign before you have to put yourself (and all OSU fans) through yet another debacle in Ann Arbor.
Thomas Orr is a senior in journalism who, along with 250 million other people in America, have not lost 10 games to Michigan.