In his first policy statement since taking office Saturday, Spain’s Prime Minster Jose Rodriquez Luis Zapatero ordered all of the 1,300 Spanish troops out of Iraq due in part to tactical differences.
“With the information we have, and which we have gathered over the past few weeks, it is not foreseeable that the United Nations will adopt a (satisfactory) resolution,” Zapatero said to The Associated Press.
The move is an embodiment of long-standing public disapproval of Spanish involvement in Operation Iraqi Freedom. It stands as the sharpest, most acute critique of Bush’s handling of the situation since France’s non-involvement nearly one year ago.
“Driven by the deepest democratic convictions, the government does not want to, cannot and will not act against or behind the backs of the will of the Spanish people,” Zapatero said.
This action should prove favorable to the majority of Spanish citizens, who had opposed going to war and the pro-war stance of former Prime Minster Jose Maria Aznar. But the effects of such a crucial policy change are uncertain for American citizens.
Most likely, the new developments abroad caused by Spain’s decisive break with Bush’s conservative administration will mean intensive shifts in the everyday vocabulary most Americans take for granted.
As was the case with french fries and French kisses, American citizens everywhere will now be forced to rename words relating to Spain and its cultural influence on the United States.
Plans to formally reject or rename many Spanish words already are being drafted by top Bush executives. Topping the lists of words in question are enchilada, which will be changed to “freedom rolls,” and Spanish Harlem, which New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg has agreed to rename “Liberty Village.”
While these linguistic changes will have lasting, countrywide influence, they may affect Ohio State students more acutely than any other demographic group. According to top officials, margaritas will soon be called “victory cocktails,” and tequila will now regain its former, more appropriate label – “devil.”
Other parts of the U.S. vocabulary is also uncertain.
As U.S. involvement prolongs and other countries start to drop out of a cause most were less enthusiastic about than the United States, the country’s vocabulary will be forced, unfortunately, to shrink. With more than 20 countries helping the American war effort, the possibilities for grudge-influenced re-labeling are nearly endless.
Many experts realize the loss of allies such as the Ukraine or the Philippines would have little or no effect on American speech. Still, many have said publicly, the repercussions of losing Italy or Poland could be dangerous.
“Entire menus and sections of major cities would have to undergo massive government restructuring,” said an expert speaking under conditions of anonymity. “Not to mention churches and monuments all over the country.”
Many feel that even this type of action is not out of the question.
“America has a long history of deleting or changing words to get back at a certain country for not agreeing with us,” said one, referencing both the recent anti-French wave and the anti-German linguistic changes during World War II.
Many feel that the most detrimental loss would be of the United States’ closest ally, Great Britain, whose populace has continually voiced disapproval of how the Iraqi invasion has been handled.
“I don’t mean just from a tactical standpoint,” he said. “Having to rename all the words from Great Britain would be a task almost unthinkable.”
John Ross is a senior in English and finds spring time a fine time for satire. He can be reached for comment at [email protected].
