Christian Lautenschleger/The LanternAndrea Cooper speaks about the rape and subsequent suicide of her daughter, Kristin, during Monday’s lecture at Mershon Auditorium. The lecture aims to raise awareness about suicide prevention. Cooper travels the country telling college students about her daughter, who committed suicide in 1995 after she was raped. Her speech, titled “Kristin’s Story,” aims to raise awareness about suicide prevention.
During high school, Cooper’s daughter, Kristin, appeared to be just like any other normal high school teenager. She was involved in a variety of activities including choir, color guard, band, theater and swim team.
When Kristin graduated from high school in 1994, she decided to go to a small college in Kansas, about 10 hours from her home.
“She wanted to be a big fish in a small pond,” Cooper said.
Cooper recalled a time her daughter was in a car accident because of icy roads. She was relieved to find out that Kristin and her friends escaped without any major injuries.
“I thought that would be the worst thing that ever happened to her,” Cooper said.
But because of a series of tragic events that would soon unfold in Kristin’s life, Cooper’s wish did not come true.
During her freshman year of college, Kristin began dating another student.
“She fell so hard so fast,” Cooper said. “She had never really been in love before.”
After a year of dating, Kristin’s boyfriend broke up with her, Cooper said.
She took it hard and would call home at least once a day to talk.
By the time Kristin came home to visit her family three weeks later, Cooper, who had been diagnosed with clinical depression, worried that her daughter might be heading down the same road.
Cooper said Kristin was a wreck when she came home for Thanksgiving, and decided to send Kristin to counseling if she had not improved by Christmas.
But by the time Kristin came home to spend what would be her last Christmas break with her family, she was happy and back to her old self.
Cooper said she and her husband did not know that Kristin was suddenly happy because she planned to kill herself.
On New year’s Eve of 1995, Cooper and her husband came home to find Kristin on the couch with music blaring in the background.
As Cooper approached her daughter, she realized something was not right. She thought maybe Kristin had drunk too much and passed out, but she quickly discovered Kristin was not breathing and had no pulse.
“I had this horrible, horrible feeling because I thought she had died from alcohol poisoning,” Cooper said.
Cooper realized that was not the case after she looked down and saw a gun in her daughter’s hand – it was then she realized her only daughter had taken her own life.
Kristin had shot herself in the head.
After Kristin’s death, Cooper got up the courage to read her daughter’s journal.
“I didn’t care how bad it was, I wanted to know what Kristin was thinking,” Cooper said.
In the journal, Cooper was shocked to find that Kristin had written a poem describing what it felt like to be raped. Although the journal did not identify the rapist, Cooper found out from Kristin’s friends that it was likely someone Kristin had worked with over the summer.
But because no one could prove who had raped Kristin, no legal action could be taken.
“She was raped by someone she thought she could trust and she could not take the pain and the hurt,” Cooper said.
Cooper said the break-up with her boyfriend was what sent Kristin over the edge.
Kristin had finally gotten up the nerve to tell her boyfriend that she had been raped, but he could not deal with it, Cooper said. A line in Kristin’s journal after the break-up read, “When I needed you the most, you deserted me after I opened up to you.”
Though Kristin’s parents do not blame her boyfriend for her death, Cooper said she thinks Kristin might have survived if he had supported her.
Cooper stressed to those in attendance the importance of being able to recognize signs of depression in friends, which include decreased energy, fatigue, self-mutilation, sleeping and eating problems, and feelings of guilt, worthlessness and helplessness.
Cooper later found out that Kristin had told a friend she was going to kill herself, but the friend did not make an effort to get Kristin help.
“I want to help you,” Cooper told those in attendance.
“If I’ve only helped five people in this room tonight, then it was so worth coming here.”
Kristin’s Story was sponsored by the Ohio State Undergraduate Student Government; the Alpha Chi Omega sorority, of which Kristin was a member; and Delta Delta Delta sorority, of which Kristin’s mother was a member.
“Our goal was to educate and get the word out about these issues,” said Julia Kennedy, the director of safety and wellness for USG and event coordinator. “I think we did.”
Nancy Radcliffe, program coordinator for the campus advocacy program at The Student Wellness Center, said she though Cooper did a great job of emphasizing the need to reach out to others. “You don’t need to be alone in your pain,” she said.
Radcliffe encourages those who have experienced rape to call the Campus Advocacy Program at 614-267-7020, which will put them in touch with trained OSU students who work closely with the local rape crisis center.
Holly Davis can be reached at [email protected].
