Harmon K. swings on both sides of the Fence. This isn’t an ordinary fence. It is a literal, physical fence here in our beloved city.Now, most of us are on one side of the Fence or the other. The Fence divides different worlds, between which interaction is rare and cursory. When you’re on one side of the Fence, it’s hard to see eye-to-eye with the people on the other side. Their values, speech and demeanor are completely different from your own. They even dress differently from you. It has been known, however, for some people to switch from one side of the fence to the other – but normally this only happens once in a lifetime. And they never look back.But Harmon K. is afraid that most of you can’t get past your preconceptions about the Fence. Therefore, let Harmon K. guide your mind where your feet fear to tread. Yes, as was mentioned, the Fence is real. You can go there. It is constructed of brick and steel. It is about five feet high. There is concrete on both sides. It is located just south of the corner of 13th Avenue and High Street. It is the low, unimposing fence that surrounds the courtyard of the Insomnia coffeehouse. Insomnia, alas, will soon fade away, riding into the sunset like some punk-rock cowboy upon his steed of asphalt and hallucinogens. Such are the unconfirmed rumors. But if true, it will mark the passing of one of the last great cultural meccas in Columbus. It was the Fence to Insomnia that Harmon K. crossed over last Saturday. It seems like a defensive fence, built to keep the outside world at bay. The question that now torments the mind is not, why was it built? But rather, is it necessary?The Fence is a metaphor of division. In our everyday lives, mixing, mingling and networking with the rich, the powerful and the sophisticated, Big Al and Harmon K. were not aware of its significance. We were part of the great OUTSIDE. Coming INSIDE made us realize how the Insomnia kids must view the world.We all know about the Insomnia kids. How does one describe them? Wacked-out, beatnik, punk-Goth spirits they are, although they themselves prefer “nonconformist” and “freaks.” Freaks let us term them then, until a better definition for their dark-clad, pierced, chain-smoking and liberal lifestyle views can be established. But even that description is inaccurate, for while such types may be visibly dominant, numerous otherwise “normal” appearing persons mix and mingle in that society.How can we define that society, that sociopolitical subculture? A few things stand out; especially an emphasis on personal independence and thought. Some intellectuality mixed with a sense that the main street culture represses and ostracizes people who value non-material or intellectual qualities.Thus far, all is good. The seed of truth lies with them. Such was what Harmon K. thought with his coffee on the front patio. He looked out at High Street. Normally, when we think about discrimination and hatred in this country, we think about race and racism, or sex and sexism. But what about sub-culturalism? The Brothers Vred have always thought sub-culturalism was kinda funny, and have indeed used this forum to make friendly jabs at certain cliched and stupid groups, namely anything involving the undergraduate greek system. So OK. We’re not perfect. Greeks are easy to lampoon. But so are the Insomnia freaks. They too possess uniforms and peculiar mannerisms. They are cliched, but they are not buttholes.But here’s where Harmon K.’s gonna stand up for the Insomnia freaks. They’re largely harmless, especially the ones that hang at coffee shops. They mostly just want to be left alone. It’s great that they have such confidence that they don’t feel like they need to retaliate when threatened.The Insomnia freaks are the minority here. They are inside the fence. The six white-trash redneck hooligans cruising High Street in the back of a white Dodge Ram pickup truck with neon lights and playing Eminem are outside the fence. They’re the majority. So why did the hicks feel the need to throw water-balloons at Insomnia? Why did that goon in the white Saturn with the mag wheels and the wide-anus exhaust tip feel the need to yell, “Insomnia sucks!”That night I was proud to be inside the Insomnia fence. Sure, I was with cliched people. But at least they weren’t buttholes.
Harmon K. is a Dental 1 student, Big Al continues as a junior CIS major. Visit them online at www.whipworm.com.