The regular season of college basketball is over. Sportswriters and coaches across the country just finished voting on all-conference teams and because I had no say in naming any of those teams, I created a team of my own.

I evaluated new candidates and pondered different combinations in my head during each Big Ten game I watched throughout the year. I am finally ready to unveil my squad. Instead of forming a normal All-Big Ten team, mine is a little different. I created a team of the five most annoying players in the conference, all of whom share an equal cockiness. Without further ado, I present my All-Big Ten Hate Team:

Josh Asselin, Sr. Center — Michigan

This pick should come as no surprise. In a column written by a Buckeye, the first player on the All-Hate Team has to be a Wolverine.

Asselin embodies everything I hate about Michigan. He is a cocky, whiny player who talks more trash than Kobe Bryant. Every time he dunks he opens his ugly mouth and starts yelling and prancing around as if he were good. His huge tattoo, greasy face and sneering smile contribute to his arrogant attitude, which I can’t stand. Asselin is a no-brainer for the list and is the only player to make my All-Hate Team four years in a row.

Lucas Johnson, Jr. Forward — Illinois

It’s almost hard to validate putting Johnson on my team because he seems like such an obvious choice for the list. Every time I watch an Illinois game I see this kid hit the floor about 15 times a game. If someone breathes on him he hits the deck in an attempt to draw a charge. Then he pumps his fist in the air and gets that look on his face, a look that can’t be described, but brings out pure rage in me every single time I see it. Johnson thinks he is good, but he sucks. Enough said.

Mike Kelley, Sr. Guard — Wisconsin

This one may be a personal thing. I have a friend who is a huge Wisconsin fan who always tells me that Kelley is better at defense than Ken Johnson. That is one of the most absurd arguments I have ever heard. Johnson was named the Big Ten Defensive Player for the Year for the second season in a row and Kelley … well, he tries hard. I can’t stand watching this guy play anymore because every time I see him get some crappy steal or draw a charge, I cringe thinking that somewhere there are people who think this guy is a better defender than Kenny.

Dane Fife, Jr. Guard — Indiana

When Dane arrived at IU three years ago, he was going to have a tough time avoiding this list. His older brother Dugan, who played at Michigan a few years ago, planted a seed of contempt in me during his playing days. Dane has done nothing but allow that seed to blossom. This kid was Mr. Basketball in Indiana as a senior in high school and look at him now — he’s awful! The only worthwhile thing he does for his team is sit the bench. He doesn’t score much, he’s not a very good passer and he isn’t anything special on defense. Plus, he’s another one of those guys with “the look.” Just glancing at him is almost unbearable. Whenever he does anything good (usually once every two games) he gets that smile that makes me want to puke.

Jon and Joe Crispin, So. and Sr. Guard — Penn State

Several people were vying for this final spot on my All-Hate Team heading into last weekend when the Bucks played PSU, and Jon Crispin managed to secure it for himself and his older brother, Joe. If there was only one Crispin on the Lions’ squad, I think I might be able to handle it, but the two of those guys out there jacking up three-pointers from wherever they want with those little smirks on their faces, it’s too much to handle. I respect Joe a great deal. He’s a good ballplayer, but I have no respect for Jon and I doubt I ever will.

OK, well that wraps up my list. As you watch the Big Ten Tournament this weekend, keep an eye out for those guys. They won’t be hard to spot. Just look for the annoying, cocky players and you’ll see what I mean.

Justin Powell is a sophomore in journalism. He would like to hear who your least favorite Big Ten player is and can be reached at [email protected]. He will publish the results of this poll later in the year.