So what did you get for your 18th birthday?
Honestly, I cannot remember, but if it happened to be a brand new Hummer H2, I think I would have remembered it for just a half a second.
Last month the nation’s top high-school player and presumably the top selection in June’s NBA Draft, LeBron James of Akron, received one of the monster sport utility vehicles from his mom for his birthday. Isn’t that sweet?
But this is not just any SUV with a base retail of around $50,000. It is practically a cut-down limousine without the chauffeur. It has three televisions, which I am sorry to say is one more than I have in my house, and comes with a video game system. It is truly the perfect ride for the high school senior and potential superstar on the go, and yet another way to be like Mike. I guess wearing Michael Jordan’s dull old No. 23 became too boring.
Wait a second — do not think I am jealous. When I turned 18, my 1986 Pontiac 6000 LE was spending more time in the shop than on the road and I desperately needed a new car. So I can totally relate to LeBron.
But the gift, which was reportedly bought by his mom Gloria after securing a loan, is now being looked into by officials of the Ohio High School Athletic Association.
The OHSAA, after many parents from James’ competitors complained, is determining if the gift instead came through an agent or through potential endorsement deals. James was spotted with the ride outside Warrensville Heights High School in Cleveland, 28 miles from his own school. Whatever happened to riding as a team on the bus?
From a distance the whole things seems fishy. I will admit after seeing the picture of James and the machine, the thought raced through my mind. One thing which leaves a bad taste in my mouth is that his father-figure and “mentor,” Eddie Jackson, is serving a three-year stint in a federal prison for mortgage and mail fraud.
But thinking rationally, the whole thing could be legit. Additionally, I really do not think LeBron or his family would be stupid enough to accept an illegal gift.
It would not take much for his mom to secure the loan. All she would have to do is flash his birth certificate to the dealership and loan officer, and the money would be approved faster than NBA Commissioner David Stern can say “With the first selection.”
Think of it not as a loan but a credit card purchase. If St. Vincent-St. Mary and James reach a fourth straight state title game on March 21, here is how it will all play out. The game ends, and while walking to the post-game press conference, he plunks his John Hancock down on a shoe contract thought to bring at least $20 million. Then in the farewell speech, the senior makes the announcement he is going pro — what a shocker. There the car is paid for.
Even if LeBron were to shock the world and announce he was coming to play for, say, Jim O’Brien and OSU, the car is still paid for. If he did not have an insurance policy already in place, watching the Fiesta Bowl and Miami running back Willis McGahee lying on the turf in agonizing pain certainly did so. Chances are his policy is worth far more than McGahee’s $2.5-million pact.
But what if it was a tainted gift? James would lose his prep and college eligibility. But look on the bright side — he could get an after-school job playing for an NBA club when they visit Indiana, Cleveland, Detroit or Philadelphia, so I am sure he could keep busy.
The biggest thing for the prep-star-that-could is he just needs to slow down a little. He is already playing in college arenas to national television and pay-per-view audiences.
Man, LeBron. Just chill out for three months and enjoy the simple life of high school. By the time the summer comes along you will have more cash than you will ever know what to do with. Enjoy the good old days of dunking over guys who will be playing the last games of their careers before jetting off to a land where you are up against men every night of the week.
Nick Houser is a senior in journalism. He can be reached at houser.85@osu. He honestly cannot remember what he got for his 18th birthday because it happened so long ago that Maurice Clarett was still playing pee-wee football.
