Graham Beckwith

I need a Mars Bar/Hey raid the Spa/To help me through the day/I need a Mars Bar/I’ve had total fun/It helps me – makes me – work rest and play-The Undertones, “Mars Bars”

I hope everyone had a good Halloween.

You’re probably hungover from candy – or alcohol.

I’d be remiss if I didn’t share my super-miracle holy grail hangover cures. Actually, these are just a few simple things that seem to work for me.

First, I should say the easiest way for people to avoid hangovers is to simply drink responsibly. Now that I’ve gotten that out of the way:

1. Drink water while drinking alcoholOne of the biggest problems with a hangover is dehydration. Actually, if you go a while during the summer without drinking water, you’ll notice the symptoms are similar. This is the simplest advice for anyone hoping to avoid hangovers, and I notice more and more people doing it. For every two beers you drink, drink a glass of water. You’ll end up pissing like a racehorse before long, but it will save you in the long-run.

2. Don’t mix beer and liquor or different liquorsThis is another preventative measure. If you’ve been drinking for a while, you should know what your limit is. Most people can have a few beers on a full stomach before they get drunk. Usually when people get into trouble, it’s when they mix vodka with cheap beer, or vodka with whiskey. They lose track of how much alcohol they have consumed, and wake up in some strange place wearing their T-shirt as shorts. Never happened to me, but you know – hypothetically speaking.

3. Force yourself to eat the day afterI know, the nausea is terrible. Force down light meals. Dry toast and cereal is what I like. I try to be extra polite to my cereal. “Please, Wheaties, go down. Please.” The goal on hangover day is to not throw up food, but going a whole day without calories makes the symptoms worse. Josh Hammel, a medical student at Emory University, recommends eggs, beans and dried peas because of the protein and high amounts of cysteine.

4. Take a shot of apple cider vinegar the next dayApple cider vinegar is an acquired taste, and I know the last thing people want to see after a night of drinking is a shot glass – but this seems to work for me. Apple cider vinegar apparently cleans out the liver and gives me a boost of energy. The organic apple cider vinegar is supposed to work better. I like using Bragg’s apple cider vinegar; it’s cheap, and I can get it from most grocery stores.

5. Drink V8 juice the next dayIt puts water back into you and gives you a full serving of veggies – which couldn’t hurt anyway. I read somewhere that when you’re hungover, you might be deficient in vitamins like B12.

6. Take painkillers/Epsom salts before bed after a night of drinkingI’ve heard this from a lot of people. This seems to be the prevailing hangover cure. I never do it, because I’m not big on painkillers, but I say go with what works for you, as long as it’s not harmful.

7. Get off the couchIf you’ve done at least some of the above, you should be feeling good enough to put down the vomit bucket. A good workout, or at least a walk outside – don’t forget the sunglasses – helps a lot. There isn’t much to be said for simply getting the blood flowing and getting Vitamin D from the sun. Laying around usually makes symptoms worse.

Graham Beckwith is The Lantern’s Arts & Life Editor. For questions, comments or health suggestions, you can reach him at [email protected].