Abby Sweet / Lantern photographer
With such a raw approach to sex advice, one might say Dan Savage earned his last name.
Thursday night at a Q&A in the Ohio Union’s US Bank Conference Theater, Savage told a group of students, “I’m here to answer all your questions and however filthy the conversation gets you can all blame yourselves.”
During the two-hour event, Savage, a sex and relationship advice columnist who will host a future show on MTV, answered questions from note cards that students had anonymously submitted prior to the event. The questions ranged from marriage to domestic violence to anal sex.
Some questions Savage could answer with only one word.
“Is getting married in college a good idea?” read one note card.
“No,” Savage said.
Another asked “How do you tell someone you have an STD?”
“Promptly,” he replied.
For other questions, Savage gave lengthy, humorous responses.
“Do orgasms always have to be mutual?” was another question.
“Absolutely not, one of the problems young people have about sex is it has to be mutual,” he said. “If you stay focused on the other person’s pleasure sometimes it can be liberating. Then next time you can say, ‘Remember when I blew you and you didn’t do anything but sit there? Your turn.'”
Another question asked, “Is it OK to make out with a ton of guys, or is that slutty?”
“You have the right to be a big a slut as you want,” Savage said. “If it’s OK with you, then that’s all that matters.”
Savage also gave his input on what he thought of the word “slut.”
“I think we need to take back the word,” he said. “We need to look at the name ‘slut’ as we do the word ‘stud.’ Not in such a negative way.”
The Q&A took a more serious turn when a question about getting out of an abusive relationship came next.
“You need to get out,” Savage said. “Abusers seem to be charmers, but you have to identify the red flags: irrational jealousy and blaming you for things you can’t control. When those flags are waving, get out, and say you’re not going to put up with this bullshit.”
Savage also confessed that he was once a victim of abuse.
“I was in an emotionally abusive relationship,” he said. “Everything was happening but getting punched. I was 30 and should have known better.”
Savage advised to end an abusive relationship with your friends beside you.
“Let people know you’re ending it for your safety,” he said. “And after the fall, get back up.”
The event ended with some questions from audience members, which were filmed along with the Q&A session for Savage’s new MTV show.
David Edelstein, a fourth-year in communication, was chosen for a private interview for the show, which consisted of two phone interviews and one sit-down interview with a representative from the show.
“We talked about sex trends, relationships and sexual climate at OSU,” Edelstein said. “I think Dan may be able to positively affect some students. Apparently he knows what he’s talking about.”
Paul Larson, a graduate student in evolution, ecology and organismal biology, said he has been reading Savage’s blog since middle school.
“I think the idea for the show is a good one,” Larson said. “Since the questions are anonymous people can ask what they really want.”
Christopher Clift, a first-year in political science, said he was excited to see Savage.
“I really admire what he does,” Clift said. “I listen to his podcast, so I’m excited to see what he does on the spot, I think he’ll do a marvelous job regardless.”
Clift also said the idea for Savage’s show, one that identifies sex and relationships in college, is a great idea.
“It’s something that needs to be addressed,” he said. “Sex is a taboo topic. A lot of schools focus on abstinence. My high school didn’t give me any education and I think this show is less focused on traditional relationships. This show is going to reach a broader audience.”