Alright boys, this one’s for you. It’s a touchy subject, but I recommend you read this because there might be a chance you’re messing up your game and not realizing it.

The problem: Pressuring girls.

Wait! I’m not talking about sex or even pressuring with malicious intent. I’m talking about subtle pressure that guys put on girls without knowing they’re doing it.

And how could you know?

Seriously, we seldom tell you, and it’s not like you mean to be a jerk.

What do I mean by subtle pressure? Here is an example that might be helpful. When pressured to sleep over at a guy’s house the other week, I gave in.

He argued it was late, and, instead of offering to walk me home when I said I didn’t want to sleep over, he kept reminding me how it wasn’t safe for a girl to walk alone this late at night. I was interested in him but to be honest, I wasn’t ready to sleep over.

Of course, once we got into bed we started hooking up. When he tried to take it a step further, I nicely but firmly stopped him.

“Why?”

“What’s the problem?”

“We’ve already been hanging out for two weeks!” He clamored. “It’s not like we’re going to have sex.”

But the answer was no. He made me feel bad for not giving him what he wanted and so obviously it turned me off emotionally. But what surprised me was that I lost complete sexual attraction to him from that point forward. It’s a shame he did that because the guy is really cool and really hot but I can assure you there will not be a next time.

Sex or any type of intimacy has to come naturally. Boys, girls connect emotionally! And we are horny! When we feel the time is right, we’ll let you know. At the beginning you might have to deal with a few cases of blue balls or a few nights without a little spoon, but the payoff is worth it. You’ll know when she wants it, trust me.
 

Read more of Ariel:

‘To reject and be rejected’

‘Drunken hookup independence’