Google’s new privacy policy will go into effect Thursday and many are asking how the controversial policy will actually affect Google users. Well, I don’t know about you, but I’m pretty psyched about it.

My entire life runs on Google and personally, I will follow them until the world ends. Gmail, Google Calender, Google Music, YouTube, Google Navigator, Google Documents (which is actually how I wrote this column), Google+ and on and on.

So here’s the deal: the new privacy settings are going to do nothing but make the Google experience more personalized, streamlined and just more Google-y in general. It’s combining all of the services under a single policy and passing information between all of them — something I actually assumed Google already did. It’s weird this is just happening.

So when Gizmodo, tech blogs and the like began freaking out about the company compromising our privacy, I was wondering what the hell was wrong with everyone.

So when you search on YouTube for the latest music video by The Strokes or an inane video involving a damn cat, Google will remember it and your results, ads and suggestions on other G-services will be more apt to produce Strokes-y and dumb-cat results.

Imagine how much more useful it will be when all services are sharing information across its services. It makes it more user-friendly and more tailored to your personal specifications.

Google’s policy states it only intends to share personal information within its own services — it will not be selling you to third parties. “And we’ll never sell your personal information or share it without your permission,” the new policy overview states.

“Until now, your Google Web History (your Google searches and sites visited) was cordoned off from Google’s other products,” said one blog post on the tech blog, Gizmodo. Gizmodo, which is spearheading the Google witch hunt, went on to say, “This protection was especially important because search data can reveal particularly sensitive information about you, including facts about your location, interests, age, sexual orientation, religion, health concerns and more.”

Uh, derp! Being pissed about this is like getting mad your Facebook profile information has the same privacy policy as, and shares its information with, the wall posting service. It’s ridiculous.

And those who accuse Google of sharing the information it gathers from us in an inappropriate fashion should consider this: Facebook generates ads from third-parties that very obviously take information from your posts and profile.

People need to stop complaining about privacy policies when most of these same people are sharing their most intimate details with Mr. Zuckerberg. And why is Google’s policy taking precedence over the face that Facebook information is never truly deleted. It remains on Facebook’s servers permanently.

Yep, you read that right. That picture of you doing a keg stand and that one with the nip-slip you thought you deleted are still accessible to God-knows-who.

Why do you care if Google keeps track of you looking up the definition of ‘conglomerate?’ Is it because you’re watching naughty things? If so, Google Chrome has this handy feature called ‘Incognito Window’ that won’t be tracked and doesn’t add anything to your history or cookies.

Google is my master. The only thing Google could do to be better is put a word count on Gdocs, because I have no idea if I’ve met my word requirement yet.

Oh. Nevermind. Found it. Google is perfect.